“Where do you see yourself in five years, ten years, etc.?” I feel like this is a question that every high-schooler gets asked at some point before they walk across that stage and reach for their diploma. In that moment in life the world feels so big, the opportunities endless and adventures awaiting. 

  Do you remember what your five year, ten year or even your fifteen year plan was? Maybe you didn’t even have one, but I figure most of us who did had similar ones. Graduate from college, get a good job, start earning some real money, get married, buy a house, start a family… on and on. It all sounds good and looks good on paper, but then life happens and plans change. Maybe your career path has changed. Maybe the things you thought were important became not important at all. Maybe there are a million other circumstances that sent your tidy little plan into a thing of the past, and that’s okay. 

  It’s okay because many of the things I thought were important as a college student turned out to be unimportant. The career path I thought for certain was my calling as a senior in high school changed a hundred times throughout college. The ways I measured success in my twenties changed by the time I entered my thirties. When I became a mom, I learned a whole new level of love and what it truly meant to put someone else’s needs before my own.

  In my thirties I learned more than I wanted about going through hard times in life. I learned to be stronger. I learned to find my confidence. I learned to trust God.

  Now as I sit here ready to exit my thirties and dive into a new decade, it’s scary. In so many ways I feel like my youth has ended. My back hurts a lot more. My face has new wrinkles that weren’t there a few weeks ago. My nights are spent packing lunches, folding clothes, getting through homework, feeding kids that are constantly starving and driving from one game or practice to the next. In the mix of all of it I sometimes find myself wondering, “What happened to Erica? What about all of the things she wanted in life? What about her plans?” Then I realize that these ARE my plans. They may not be the same ones I had in high school, but as I grew older, my plans evolved and grew with me. The things I used to find important don’t matter to me now. The way I measure success is different than before. The way I live life has changed because I’ve changed. 

  As I open this door into a new decade, I’m also pretty darn excited. I’m excited to feel free from so many things that I thought were supposed to matter, but don’t. I’m excited to live quieter, simpler, and enjoy this journey a little deeper. I’ve been blessed to earn the degrees, have the house, the marriage, the kids, the money, but I’ve also gained so much more along the way than I ever could have imagined. 

  Ultimately, I know that I’m right where I’m supposed to be in life with the people I’m supposed to be living it with; and there’s an overwhelming comforting peace in knowing that. It’s a peace that I don’t think everyone gets to feel because they can’t let go of how they think their life is supposed to be. 

  So as I step into decade number four, I’m going to do it with confidence, humbleness, peace and anticipation for the great things to come. This is a decade that some of my friends/classmates will never have the privilege to experience. It’s a decade where my fist child will graduate high school and college, my middle child will graduate high school and my baby will start school. It’s a BIG decade with so much life to be lived and so many memories to make. It’s a decade where I’m finally comfortable with who I am and thankful for the last 39 years that molded me into who I’ve become. Here’s to forty! 

Until next time,

Erica